Before I begin, I will concede the fact that most people underestimate how hard everyone else's job is. I see this all the time when people say to me "Wow, you just get to read comics and watch The Simpsons all day", which is very, very far from the truth. While it's a pretty casual environment and we're not afraid to take a break to talk about movies, tv, what we've read, or anything else, we all work very hard there and there will always be more work to do. That being said, I really don't think it's that hard to work in fast food. Tolerating the fact you work there may be difficult, but if teenagers and retards can perform the tasks, it really can't be that hard. Somehow, however, they always manage to fuck it up. Here are a few examples, in order from smallest to biggest fuck up.
Today, my girlfriend and I went to Burger King for lunch. When our food was up, I asked the person handing us the tray for four things of onion ring sauce. If you've
never dipped your fries from BK in the onion ring sauce, you have no idea what you're missing; it's fantastic. Anyway, the woman puts two things of onion ring
sauce on my tray, and smiles at me as if I should walk away. At first I thought that I was being told, "Fuck you, you can't have 4." Then it occurred to me
that English was probably not this person's second language. Anyway, I asked for a couple more, and she then put an empty cup on my
tray and again smiled like our transaction was complete. What the fuck could I possibly want an empty cup for? I again asked for a couple
more things of onion ring sauce, and gave up when I was only given one more. Fortunately, the food was surprisingly delicious for a Burger King.
Unrelated to the service, we were eating our food at some outdoor tables they had, when a guy walked out of the restaurant. He was alone
and wearing one of the crowns they have around the store for kids. I'm personally not a big fan of eating alone at a restaurant, even
a fast food place, but this dude may as well have been wearing a shirt that said "No one's showing up for my birthday party."
Overall, the experience today wasn't that bad, and was more funny than annoying. My next example, also from Burger King, is much more severe.
I had ordered the Ultimate Double Whopper. It was a sandwich they had for a limited time, and it was monstrous. What I got was a Whopper Jr.
How do you fuck that up? I asked for the absolute largest sandwich they have and got possibly the smallest sandwich they have. I've
have incorrect orders before, but that's not even close.
The single worst thing that happened, however, was at a Pizza Hut. They had these things called dipping strips, which was basically a pizza cut into thin rectangles to dip in various sauces. We ordered some variety of dipping strips pizza, left the phone number, and were told it'd be ready in like 25 minutes. When we showed up, there was no pizza. They were completely out of the dough they use to make these pizzas. They also had our phone number, and couldn't have been bothered to call, so we had to wait 45 minutes while they made us some other pizza that wasn't even what we wanted to begin with. I understand they may have been busy, but when you see a ticket there that is impossible to complete and the customers are going to be showing up, wouldn't it occur to you at some point to call those people? You did ask for their phone number after all.
Would you like fries with that? Tough shit, here's a chicken nugget. Just one.
© 2008 by Dr. Jeebus