When I decided to make a list of the best Simpsons episodes ever, I thought it was going to be hard. I had to examine basically every
episode from seasons three through ten as being in contention for a spot among the best episodes. Just about everything from that time period
was gold. Then I realized that I had presented myself with an even harder task, and I couldn't turn it down. Almost every episode from
season three through season ten is classic. Would it even be possible to find 10 episodes I didn't like? Now keep in mind that these
episodes all have some laughs in them, and in some cases many laughs. Afterall, these are the best seasons of one of the best shows of all
time. Despite having their share of laughs, however, these episodes just don't work for me. So now I present to you, in order, the ten
worst episodes from the eight best seasons of The Simpsons.
10. A Milhouse Divided - Season 8: This episode focuses a lot more on drama and a lot less on comedy. When I think of The Simpsons, the first word that comes to mind is not "realism", yet much of the episode is a realistic take on the divorce of Milhouse's parents and the effects it has on him as a child. The dinner party also reminds me of the movie "The Break-up" with Vince Vaughan and Jennifer Aniston. That movie was God awful because it was just two hours of sitting there uncomfortably watching them fight, which is not entertaining. However, this episode does get props for the debut of Kirk Van Houten's "Can I Borrow A Feeling?"
9. A Streetcar Named Marge - Season 4: I gave this episode an honorable mention for the best use of Maggie, but overall I don't particularly like this episode. There's no shortage of episodes in which we see Homer as neglectful and see the couple's relationship suffer challenges and such, but this is one of the least entertaining. Much of the episode is Homer just being more annoying than normal so that we can see Marge become a successful actress, but there are few jokes in his rudeness or her transformation. I also feel like John Lovitz was really wasted in this episode, though he would certainly get his due in other roles.
8. All Singing, All Dancing - Season 9: I'm not normally a big fan of clip shows, the "138th Episode Spectacular" withstanding, and The Simpsons has plenty to choose from. I particularly dislike this episode, however, despite being a fan of music and musicals in general, as well as liking all the songs that they do in the clips. I think the problem stems from the fact that the new material is pretty much dreadful. Yeah the clips may be good songs, but they were good the first time too, when they're actually in context. The family singing about how they sing a lot is a pretty weak way of pulling this episode together, and the entire thing with Snake I find to be outright terrible.
7. My Sister, My Sitter - Season 7: This episode feels more like an episode of a regular sitcom than an actual Simpsons episode. The concept of Lisa as a babysitter has potential, and her interation with Rod and Todd works well, but as soon as she's charged with babysitting Bart things go downhill completely. Bart's rather predictable hijinks and Lisa's inability to get him to go to bed combine for an overall lukewarm ride.
6. El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer - Season 8: Remember how I said that there was no shortage of episides in which we see Homer as negelctful and see Homer and Marge's relationship suffer challenges? Well here's another one. This episode is actually funnier than "A Streetcar Named Marge", which is why this is a worse episode. The setup for this episode is fantastic. Marge trying to keep Homer from getting to the chili cookoff, him walking around like he's "the pope of chili town", and finally him going on a psychadelic drug trip induced by all the Guatamalian insanity peppers is a great setup. The drug trip could have taken him in any directions at all. The space coyote could have told him to open a detective agency, try out for the Olympics, or start pushing drugs. There are really no limits on where it could have gone, but they decided to travel down an already extremely beaten path. If they had taken this in a different direction, that opening could easily have led to one of the best episodes of all time.
5. Mother Simpson - Season 7: This episode feels like it exists for no reason other than filling in holes in Simpsons lore. I may be being too hard on this episode as there are some classic jokes in it, such as when Chief Wiggum tries to call in an APB and send all available cars to Greek town, but for the most part it just feels like the decided that it was time to explain what happened to Homer's mother and to explain where Lisa came from, as she seems to have little in common with Homer or Marge, especially her intelligence and humourless vegetarianism.
4. Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington - Season 3: The show was still young so I should let this one slide, however it's the only episode from season three on this list so I feel I've been more than fair in that regard. This episode isn't bad persay, it just doesn't feel like an episode of The Simpsons. I love America and all, but I find this episode to be a little too touchy feel and pro America and such. The idea of Nelson, who even at this point had already been established pretty much as a mindless bully, entering an extracurricular essay contest just feels plain wrong. Best part of the episode is when Lisa goes to the Jefferson Memorial because the Lincoln Memorial is too crowded.
3. Simpsons Bible Stories - Season 10: I have the seven minute format, and these stories aren't terrible good. If season ten had featured the Simpsons Tall Tales episode instead of this one, then we'd be in the number one spot right now. These episodes are basically a way for the writers to say "We don't feel like making a real story, so here's three stories that have existed for centuries, or in this case for millenia". If they couldn't be bothered to write an episode I shouldn't bother writing about it, so I'll just say "thumbs down".
2. Marge Be Not Proud - Season 7: I don't think Christmas episodes have ever really been The Simpsons strong point, and this one I think is the worst of all. Much like "My Sister, My Sitter", this doesn't feel like a Simpsons episode so much as it does an episode of a regular sitcom. Boy wants a game, boy can't afford it, boy shoplifts, boy learns a valuable lesson. The voicemail that Don Brodka leaves is funny for the fact that it's a voicemail and wasn't a phone call, but that's one of the few highlights of the episode. This really feels like something they should have gotten out of the way in season two. I don't need to see 20 minutes of a kid thinking his mother hates him.
1. Bart the Mother - Season 10: Here we have the absolute worst episode of the best seasons of The Simpsons. It's no surprise that two of the three worst episodes were from season
ten, as it started to signal the shows decline. This episode is pretty much bad from start to finish. In fact, it's bad in almost the exact same
way as "Marge Be Not Proud". With both episodes, the entire thing is based on a very realistic portrayal of the relationship between
an an angry/disappointed mother and a misbehaving but remorseful son. In this episode, Bart and Nelson try to be friends and Bart accidentally
kills a bird. He takes the bird's nest and eggs home to hatch them, and two lizards hatch from the eggs instead. The only real laugh
in the episode is when they take the lizards to the Springfield Birdwatching Society to have them identified, and Skinner explains that the
lizards have "already wiped out the dodo, the cuckoo, and the ne-ne, and it has nasty plans for the booby, the titmouse, the woodcock, and the titpecker."
That's right, the only real attempt at humour in the entire episode is less of a joke and more of a test to see how much they can get
past the censors. This was the last episode written by David S. Cohen before leaving to work on Futurama, so it's a wonder that Futurama
was any good if this is how we are to judge Cohen's work.
There you have it! The ten worst episodes from the eight best seasons of The Simpsons. Join me tomorrow for Part 1 of the 25 greatest Simpsons episodes of all time!!!
Find your soulmate Homer. This is just your memory; I can't provide you with any new information.
© 2009 by Dr. Jeebus